


Midgard Misadventures

by Souless_Robot



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Age Swap, Alien Invasion, Alternate Universe - Age Changes, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BAMF Hela (Marvel), Babysitting, Big Sis Hela, Gen, Hela was never banished, Kid Thor (Marvel), Protective Siblings, Teen Loki, Thor and Loki age reversal, Thor is out to make friends
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-16
Updated: 2019-09-08
Packaged: 2019-11-19 09:36:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18134051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Souless_Robot/pseuds/Souless_Robot
Summary: Teenage Loki is meant to be babysitting his youngest brother; Thor, of course, can’t sit still for two minutes and accidentally falls into a gap between Yggdrasil. Thor is in for quite the adventure as he ends up on Midgard during the Battle of New York. Meanwhile, Loki needs to get his brother back before anyone notices he's missing, and especially before their sister's coronation.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t think I’ve found any fics that have Thor and Loki’s ages reversed and I felt like that could be a fun thing to play with. Plus little Thor is a hyperactive ball of sunshine I’m sure. In this story, Thor is probably around 7 or 8 in human years and Loki is around 15, Hela is in her late 20s. Then I added Hela because I can’t get enough of big sis Hela and I sprinkle in the Avengers because yes. So here everyone have a fun retelling of the Avengers with the three Odinsons because Odin was not a terrible parent.

“ _Play with me,_ Loki!” Thor begged, tugging on the sleeve of his brother’s robe.

 

Loki brushed him off, ignoring him as he turned the page of his thick tome. He was finally getting beyond theory and into the practical aspects of illusion _seidr_ . Truly, it was a _wonder_ that Thor could always have such bad timing.

 

“I’m bored,” Thor whined again as he tried to climb up into Loki’s lap to get a better look at his book. Loki promptly shoved him off,  hearing Thor land on the stone floor with a thud.

 

_For Hel’s sake._

 

Loki glanced at his brother to make sure he wasn’t close to tears. The last thing he needed today was for Thor to run off and tattle to Mother.

 

But, instead, Thor sat up, rubbing the back of his head. He gave Loki a particularly irritated look.

 

“That’s not _fair_ ,” Thor complained from his heap on the floor, “Mother said you were supposed to spend time with me and all you’re doing is being _boring_. Let’s play ‘dragon hunters’, or we can go-”

 

“Let’s play the _silent_ game,” Loki said, cutting Thor off mid-sentence and flipping to the next page.

 

It was bad enough that he was tasked with watching Thor in the first place. What were his nursemaids _for,_ if not this? But, oh no, by Odin’s _beard,_ Thor couldn’t ever let anything be easy. _Norns ruin us all if that happened_ . Instead, Thor had thrown a tantrum about how he was too old to be looked after. Naturally, he came to this conclusion _days_ before Hela’s coronation, when their Mother had no time to watch him. Still, Loki could grudgingly respect their mother’s way of distracting Thor; the boy was more stubborn than a mountain on his good days. Unfortunately, her clever ploy had involved convincing Thor that spending time with him _wasn’t_ technically minding because they were brothers.

 

So here he sat trying to read while his _svinhqfdi_ of a younger brother glared at one of the oldest books in Asgard.   

 

“No,” Thor said, crossing his arms over his chest and puffing his cheeks up. “You can’t trick me into being quiet so you can keep reading. I’m not forty anymore, brother.”

 

Loki sighed and lowered his book. That was the irritating thing about Thor; he was only _selectively_ stupid.  

 

“How about hide and seek, then?”

 

Thor gave him a suspicious look, chewing on his lip as he tried to suss out if it was a trick. Loki smirked internally; poor little Thor. It would take him _millennia_ before he even got close.

 

“You mean it, brother?” The instant Thor seemed to come to a decision, his face lit up as he scrambled to his feet.

Loki nodded his ascent and was rewarded with a full-blown, enthusiastic smile. Norns, how did he do that? It was like the sun just rose over the horizon.

 

“You can count first!” Thor called, already rushing for the door, “And no scrying this time, Loki!”

 

Loki watched Thor leave and the door slip close behind him. He truly was so much closer to seeing the trick this time. Too bad he was still far too gullible. With a bemused smile on his face, Loki propped his book open and continued reading.  

 

* * *

 

 

Thor ran as fast as his feet would take him. He wouldn’t put it past Loki to count in Vanirtungu to make the time shorter, so he needed to be quick. He rushed down the stairs at breakneck speed, nearly colliding into servants as he ran around corners. Then he was out of the main palace and into the bustling courtyard. There were goods and traders as far as the eye could see. The exotic colors of Alfheim robes were sprinkled throughout the crowd as more and more people arrived for Hela’s coronation. He could even spot some of the dwarves from Nidavellir as they hauled their gifts to the new queen across the courtyard.

 

Thor couldn’t stop his excitement. The last time they’d had a feast this big was when Father and Hela had ended the war with Jotunheim. Even then, he’d been too young to attend the full festivities. But this time, this time he would make sure he got to stay. If Loki was old enough now, surely he was too.  

 

_Speaking of Loki…_

 

Thor glanced uneasily behind him, half-expecting to see Loki’s green robes emerging from the crowd. There was no sign of him, though, Thor let out a sigh of relief. If Loki had found him so easily, he’d probably be stuck in the library all day. He needed to get to his hiding spot, and _fast_. Thor darted past the caravan of people and out the front gate with a cheerful wave to the guardsmen.

 

Loki probably thought he’d hide in the kitchens or someplace similar. Thor grinned.

 

_Not this time._

 

He’d found the best hiding place out in the forest by the Bifrost when he was playing Valkyries with Sif last week. It would stump Loki for sure. Thor suppressed a giggle as he imagined the look on Loki’s face when he walked by and Thor jumped out and scared him. It would serve him right after the last prank with the Frog.

 

Thor made his way through the forest careful to stay out of the sight of any of the patrols. He wouldn’t put it past Loki to bribe them into finding him. No, his hiding spot was so good, he would bet not even Heimdall, with his all-seeing, golden eyes, could find him. Thor passed a clearing and then turned left at the creek before he came to a thick patch of berry bushes. He got down on his knees and crawled into the thicket, carefully tucking his red cape around him so he didn’t snag it. Then he crouched down in the bushes, his knees digging into the marshy ground.

 

This was the perfect spot. He could see anyone coming or going from the creek and the brush was so thick, not even his cape was visible from the outside. He knows; him and Sif had taken turns trying to find any thinning in the foliage, just in case. His teachers always told him it was important to know the weaknesses of your defenses. Not to mention that the bushes were chocked full of perfectly ripened bilberries. He grinned, now he only needed to wait Loki out.

 

There he waited.

 

And waited.

 

And waited.

 

And _waited_.

 

His foot tapped idly against the ground as he plucked one of the bilberries off the branch and popped it into his mouth. The tangy sourness burst across his tongue. Thor frowned; this was _boring_. Loki was supposed to come find him.

 

He ate a few dozen more berries as he hummed to himself, trying to stay still as he lay in wait. He wiped his purple-stained hands on his tunic and glanced towards the creek, hoping to hear the rustle of coming footsteps. There was still no sign of Loki.

 

Thor rubbed his eyes and let out a small yawn. His knees burned from kneeling in place for so long. He tentatively stood up and stumbled out from behind the bushes, expecting to be met by one of his brother’s pranks. Instead, there was nothing.

 

Where was Loki? Was his spot _really_ so good that his brother wasn’t able to find him?

 

Thor stood on his shaking legs. They tingled from remaining still so long. He shook out the pin and needles from his limbs and slapped his palms against his face with a resounding smack as he tried to ward off the drowsiness.  He was 120 years old and he didn’t need naps anymore!

 

A thought struck Thor: maybe Loki was confused and thought _he_ was supposed to be hiding. He ran the conversation over in his head; he’d rushed out of the library so fast maybe Loki hadn’t heard him and Loki had been hiding all this time waiting for Thor to come find him.

 

_Yes, that must be it!_

 

Well, that was fine. Thor was a _great_ seeker. Seeking was like questing, and Thor _loved_ to play questing. He’d find Loki in no time. He’d start with the forest; after all if _his_ spot was good, Loki might have a found a better one out here himself.

 

He wandered between the trees, a carefree smile on his lips as he searched behind rocks and by the creek for his brother. He’d yet to have any success beyond startling a stag. He’d briefly given up his search to chase the animal for a bit before he remembered Loki was still waiting for him.

 

Thor passed a series of boulders on the forest floor when something glinted off the sunlight filtering from overhead. It looked vaguely shiny. Thor walked closer, clambering up the rocks only to find a green serpent sunning itself.

 

“Loki?” Thor whispered as he climbed closer to poke it. He wouldn’t pick it up, not after what happened last time. Thor still had the scars and the memory of Loki laughing at him.

 

The snake raised its head, let out a low hiss, and then flicked its tongue out, scenting the air.

 

“Loki?” Thor asked again, more hopeful. That certainly seemed like a very Loki response. The snake ignored him and began to slink down the boulder. Thor followed it because everything it had just done was very reminiscent of his brother.

 

“Brother I found you; change back so I can tag you!”

 

The serpent continued to make its way through the undergrowth.

 

“Don’t be a sore loser!” Thor yelled as he crawled after the snake. Loki in his serpent form was too fast though, and with a few more twists, he was quickly disappearing from view.

 

“Wait, don’t move so fast!”

 

Thor didn’t pause as he made a hurried scramble through the bushes. Suddenly, there was no solid ground under him. Air breezed upwards, surrounding him. He was falling.

 

Thor flung his hands out, flailing them in every direction, only to be met with empty space. The wind was whistled in his ears and it was suddenly so dark that he couldn’t see anything.

 

There was something wrong, something _very_ wrong. It was day, so why was it so _dark_?

 

As quickly as his fall started, it ended as Thor slammed into something solid. All the air was knocked out of his lungs as he lay on his back.

 

_Ow_ , he thought distantly as his brain tried to catch up with his body. Where _was_ he?

 

As soon as Thor could hear his own thoughts again he sat up. He groaned. His body felt like he’d been sparring all day. He rolled over, his eyes adjusting to the dim light.

 

It appeared he was in some type of cavern. Everything looked grey around him, and when he looked up, he could see a faint crack of light from overhead. That must be where he’d fallen from. He made his way over to the edge of the cave, running his hand along the stone walls. They were smooth, _unnaturally_ smooth.

 

Thor gulped. There was no way he could get back up there; it was far too high up and there was no way for him to grip the walls as he climbed. He would need to find another way out of the cave.

 

Thor shook himself off and wrapped his cape tighter around his body. He felt cold all of a sudden. This wasn’t quite the quest he’d been expecting.

 

Something moved in the corner of his eye. He whirled to face it, fists raised high. “Whoever’s there, _show yourself!”_

 

Out of the shadows slithered the green snake.

 

“Thank the Norns you’re here too, Loki!” Thor squealed in delight, “You can use your magic to float us back up there!” Thor pointed enthusiastically to the crack of light above them.

 

The snake paused. Its tongue flickered out before it turned and made its way deeper into the cave.

 

“Loki, wait! Where are you going?” Thor trailed after the snake, trying to keep up with it in the darkness. What was Loki thinking? The way out was back there.

 

He tripped in the darkness. His hands came up, trying to catch his body as it fell. They crunched down on the rocks below them, jarring his wrists as he landed. He could feel something sharp cutting into his palms. He couldn’t make out his hands, but he could smell the metallic tinge in the air. He was bleeding. He pulled his hands back into his cape; they stung. He didn’t like this. His hands _hurt_ and it was _dark_ and he wanted to go **_home_ **!

 

Thor scrunched up smaller against his cape. He was scared and he wanted to go home. His eyes prickled as he realized he couldn’t sense any movement around him. He couldn’t see the snake in the darkness. Loki had left him.

 

He froze. His throat suddenly felt tight.  

 

“This isn’t funny anymore! It isn’t _funny. Come back!_ If- if you don’t come back, I’m telling Mother!”

 

No one answered.

 

His eyes stung and he rubbed the palms of his hands into his eyes. He felt something wet drip onto his injured hands, making them sting. He wasn’t crying, Princes of Asgard didn’t _cry_.

 

He sniffled. It didn’t matter if stupid Loki left him. He could find his way out of one dumb cave by himself. He didn’t _need_ Loki!

 

Thor stumbled to his feet, feeling his way forward in the blackness. He _would_ get out of here and then he would go tell Mother what Loki had done.

 

* * *

 

 

Thor wasn’t sure how long he stumbled around for. What he did know was that he was thoroughly lost and that he wanted his Mother. He took one tentative step, then another, his fingertips brushing along the walls as he walked. He’d been murmuring prayers to the Norns for the last hour.

 

He felt a shift in the earth. Something _moved_ beneath him. What in the seven Hels was _that_?

 

The ground rumbled around him, and he scrambled closer to the wall, looking to steady himself. His hands brushed the smooth rock wall. Thor hissed as the force dug into the scratches on his palms.  He struggled trying to hold on as the cave seemed to move this way and that, trying to shake him into the abyss.

 

What madness _was_ this?

 

As quickly as the shaking started, it stopped and Thor let out a hysterical laugh.

 

“Stupid cave, I am a son of Odin. _Do your worst_!”  Thor yelled into the emptiness.

 

His voice echoed around him, fading into the darkness.

 

Then the earth tilted sideways, and Thor was falling again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ending notes: Thanks to all the people over on the Write With Me Discord who listened to my ideas and helped me edit this chapter into something semi-readable and offered great suggestions to improve this story! Vanirtungu mean Vanir tongue, essentially Thor is referring to Loki cheating by counting in a different language. Svinhqfdi means pighead which is an accurate description of Thor. Comments and Kudos are very much appreciated. I have most of this story written so I should have more chapters up soon!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil Coulson is compromised and Clint Barton is not having a good week.

Clint was having a rotten day, no wait, scratch that a rotten  _ week _ . Really he should have known better when Fury called him in. He was supposed to be on vacation for chrissake, eating pizza and watching movies with his family. Instead, here he was following a nameless agent down into the concrete bowels of SHIELD’s headquarters. 

 

They led him to a windowless briefing room. Inside there was a steel table and two metal folding chairs. Clint plopped down in one of the chairs and kicked his feet up on the table. He saw the agent’s eye twitch in irritation but the woman was enough of a professional she didn’t comment. Instead, she gestured at a thick manila folder on the table and closed the door behind her. 

 

The top of each page was stamped with the bright red top secret lettering. Clint didn’t blink an eye at that or the dozens of black redactions scratched across the pages, that was all usual for his line of work. No, what was odd about this was the mission topic, compromised SHIELD agents at a top-secret lab? That kind of thing didn’t happen at SHIELD, not on Fury’s watch. Everyone knew that even Fury’s secrets had secrets, so who the hell had gotten enough intel to lead a successful attack? 

 

Clint skimmed halfway down the page until he got to the names of the compromised personnel.

 

He froze. Third down on the list in plain twelve point font were the words: Phillip Coulson. 

 

The files slipped out of his hands as he stood. There was no way, not Coulson. Coulson was one of the few people he could trust with his life. The man would sooner cut his wrists and bleed to death than give up SHIELD secrets. There had to be a mistake. 

 

“I need to talk to Fury.  _ Now!. _ ” 

 

The female agent poked her head through the door, “I’m sorry Agent Barton, the Director is busy. Have you finished reading? If so, the Director requested you wait here for your partner.” 

 

The female Agent smiled warmly at him as she gestured back to the folder. She had no right to be that positive, not when his world was damn near crumbling around him. 

 

Clint ground his teeth as he grudgingly sat down again, his hands flipping through the pages absently. These  _ bastards _ got their hands on Coulson. They’d nabbed him from right under SHIELD‘s nose. 

 

A sudden shiver ran down his spine. 

 

He was supposed to have been on the Pegasus Lab detail. They’d originally given that mission to him. The only reason he wasn’t there was a time-sensitive mission in Japan popped up. A few more hours and it might not have been Coulson that was a brainwashed alien agent; it could have been him. 

 

Clint glared his way through the rest of the report. Trying to file away the important details despite his bubbling rage. 

 

His takeaways? 

 

Apparently, aliens were real, they had some sort of problem with Earth, and they’d somehow gotten their scaly hands on Coulson. 

 

The aliens' thing probably would have been a lot more shocking if he wasn’t still seeing red from Coulson being listed as a compromised asset. Should he be worried? Probably. But, right now he couldn’t bring himself to be anything but  _ pissed. _ It was the aliens that should be running scared because he’s going to put an arrow through their eyes the first chance he gets. 

 

He knew shit was real when the door clanged open and Natasha swept into the room. She had a bruise on her face and murder in her eyes. Natasha was one of the best; she didn’t get hurt, much less bruised like that unless she wanted too. The cold look in her eyes told him this particular shiner wasn’t intentional and that never boded well for anyone. 

 

Natasha slid into the seat across from him and glared at the other female agent until she left the room. She flipped the folder closed with a swish.

 

“We’re going to India to pick up Banner.” 

 

“The Hulk? I thought Fury said that was just observation for now.” 

 

“Not anymore. Fury’s activating the Avengers Initiative.” 

 

Clint sucked in a breath. Well,  _ fuck him _ , things kept getting better and better. He ran a hand through his cropped hair. 

 

“Okay, fine I guess we’re doing this. Let me grab my bow and we’ll go.”

 

Natasha quirked an eyebrow at him, but her eyes didn’t crinkle in amusement, “Sure you don’t want something with a bit more firepower?” She said, gesturing to her sidearm. 

 

“Nat, if half of what’s in that folder is true these bastards are lucky I’m not getting anymore medieval on their asses. I have half a mind to use some shit I know would break international protocol.”

 

Natasha’s expression morphed into a feral smile, “I wouldn’t worry about that or the Geneva Convention. Our orders are any means necessary.” 

 

Well, if the aliens weren’t running scared yet, they damn well should be, Clint thought with a grim smile. Between him and Natasha, they knew over five hundred ways to kill a man with a toothpick —they’d sat down and counted after a mission in Kosovo— and right now he was just itching to try them all out. 

 

* * *

 

 

That was four days ago; since then SHIELD had collected a narcissistic playboy, a man out of time, and a non-descriptive scientist that had a bad case of Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde. In Clint’s honest assessment the Earth was  _ screwed  _ and he wasn’t just saying that because he was an eternal pessimist, thank you very much, Natasha _. _ No, the reason was that Rogers and Stark couldn’t even sit in the same room without starting to play fisticuffs. Their macho  _ bullshit  _ was going to get everyone killed. And then there was Stark’s habit of flirting with everything that moved, including Banner. Clint could tell by Natasha’s eye tick she was getting closer and closer to making the inventor disappear permanently after this particular mission.  

 

And then Germany  _ happened _ \- 

 

And honestly,  _ fuck Germany _ , no scratch that,  _ fuck all of Europe _ . Nothing good ever happened when he went to Europe, Budapest included.  

 

He'd gotten stabbed in the shoulder by some kind of telekinetic Squidward looking son of a bitch, Ebony Maw his addled brain supplied. The flat faced grey alien had called himself Ebony Maw as he went around murdering civilians. The recorded screams from the CCTV cameras were still fresh in his mind.

 

The bastard and his cronies killed sixty-five people before the Avengers touched down, all while preaching about 'our lord and savior Thanos has saved you’  and ‘releasing them from chains of universal suffering’. 

 

Clint didn't know this Thanos, but if he ever met him he was going to put an arrow through his  _ fucking eye. _

 

_ Sayonara motherfucker. _

 

Between Stark and Rogers they'd managed to get the rest of the terrified civilians out, but not before Maw waved his magic glow stick and set Coulson on them. 

 

The fight was fast and brutal. Coulson didn’t go down without a fight, a well-aimed left hook from him had Clint’s head ringing.  Clint jabbed out with an elbow and managed to catch the man in the guts. 

 

The two grappled before Clint got his arms around Coulson and flipped his former friend to the ground. Clint pressed his knees into Coulson’s shoulders as he used his full weight to keep the man pinned. Coulson stared up at him with his unnaturally iridescent blue eyes, then he smiled, blood in his teeth. That’s when Clint noticed the flashing light in Coulson’s suit pocket. 

 

His hearing aids finally registered the rapid beeping over the sounds of the struggle. Then the beeping stopped. Clint’s eyes widened as he dove for the ground. 

 

Around them, the buildings exploded. 

 

Mechanic feedback screeched through his aids. His hands flew to his ears as he tried to yank out the tiny devices. He cursed as he managed to pull out the tech and the world around him went back to its usual silence. 

 

When he looked back at the ground. Coulson was gone escaping in the chaos and Maw was nowhere to be found. The Avengers were left standing in the flaming ruins of Berlin. Not one step closer to tracking the Tesseract or gaining insight into Maw’s plans with it. 

 

While the details of Maw’s plans were foggy at best, his intentions were clear as day. If the man spewing zealotry was to be believed they were looking at some sort of species-wide cleanse, a xenocide on a scale hitherto undreamt of.  

 

* * *

 

 

Clint was currently sprawled out on an uncomfortable swivel chair on the bridge of the Helicarrier. He'd commandeered an entire pot of black coffee. The other agents were giving him odd looks and a wide berth. It was hard to tell if they were in awe of meeting the legendary Hawkeye or if they were disturbed by his uncivilized coffee habit. 

 

_ Screw them _ . They had no right to judge, he'd been running on an average three hours of sleep per night this week, if he didn't meet his caffeine quota he was pretty sure he would collapse into a useless puddle on the spot. 

 

Natasha strolled in a couple minutes later. She quirked an eyebrow up but didn't say anything as she reached over for the pot and poured the brown steaming liquid into her own mug. 

 

"I see where all the coffee has gone."

 

Clint grunted at her as she gracefully fell into the chair next to him. She leaned towards him so her hands were in his line of sight and then quickly signed, "There's a problem."

 

He groaned internally. This week kept getting better and better. 

 

"What kind of problem?" Clint flashed back with his hands.

 

Natasha casually looked over her shoulder before she leaned in closer and passed him a note. He shot her a look of disbelief —because really Nat if he knew they were going for the old Cold War bench (or in this case coffee counter) trade-off he would have gotten in character first. She seemed to read his line of thought and rolled her eyes at him while he unfolded the page. 

 

In Natasha’s carefully coded handwriting was the following:  Fury thinks there might be alien planted tech on board. Banner picked up weird interference coming from the hanger. Whatever it is it's messing with the machines enough that Banner is recalibrating the system to ignore it and lock unto the cube. The mission is to contain or remove and keep status silent.

 

Clint crumpled the paper in his right hand and took a swig of his coffee before replying in a low voice, “Sounds great. Fury should put Stark right on that, sounds just his speed.” 

Natasha gave Clint a look, “Stark already went to check it out. Said it sounded like his kind of party.” She glanced around them, eyeing the agents working on their computers, "He just thinks that the more the merrier.”

 

Great, so he and Nat were backup or the cleanup crew whatever was necessary. Clint nodded. Stark was a lot of things, but subtle wasn’t on the list. If Fury wanted this kept quiet and dealt with he should have sent in anyone but Stark. Then again, the reality was that whatever the anomaly was it was probably above everyone’s pay grade here except Stark’s and Banner’s. 

 

Clint stood and Nat rose to follow him as they headed for the hanger. He checked around them to make sure they were out of anyone’s earshot before he pulled Natasha to the side. 

 

"When did this interference start? Right after we pulled out of Germany?" 

 

If that was what happened then their quinjet was likely the source of the problem. It would be annoying, but easy enough to deal with. If worse came to worse the could blow the thing up over the ocean. That was petty change compared to SHIELD’s overall budget. 

 

Natasha shook her head, "No, that's what's strange about the whole thing. It was after we were cloaked and halfway over the Atlantic. At first, they thought it was an unexpected electrical interference from the storm, but none of our other sensors have been affected."

 

"Storm?" Clint asked. It'd been clear starry sky when they'd returned from Berlin a few hours ago.

 

"A big one. Not enough to steer us off course. But still a bit odd considering that it picked up suddenly and wasn't on any of the forecasts." Natasha frowned and Clint could see the pieces coming together in her mind. In their line of work, there was no such thing as coincidences or happy accidents. 

 

"Huh, well let's go see if our resident tech genius has the situation under control yet." 

 

* * *

 

 

Whatever Clint expected when he walked into the hanger, it wasn't this. 

 

Natasha and him found Tony in full armor with his faceplate lifted. His arms were raised in a placating gesture to something beyond their field of vision.  

 

Clint was immediately on his guard as he pulled his bow from his shoulder and notched an arrow. On his left, Natasha reached for her pistol. 

 

"Look, kid. I don't want to hurt you just come out." Stark said, his voice lacking its usual sarcastic bravado. 

 

Stark took a step closer and a red blur rushed out from behind the metal containers. It tackled him to the ground and the man went down like a rock even with his suit on. He either must have been off balance or the attacker had a  _ hell of a tackle _ . 

 

Natasha nodded at him, Clint went right, as she quietly moved to the left to pin in their target on either side of Tony. From this distance, neither him nor Natasha would miss. 

 

"You cannot fool me, Man of Metal!" A small voice rang out. On instinct, Clint lowered his bow to his side. There was a kid up here? 

 

Then the attacker fully sat up from his place on top of Stark. 

 

_ Oh shit, _ Clint thought as blond hair fell away from the figure and he was left staring at what looked like an eight-year-old child. 

 

The kid was dressed like he’d come from a renaissance festival. A green little tunic, some stained brown pants, boots, and to top it all off an honest to god red cape. He had his fists raised above Stark's mask as if hitting him would do anything to that armor. If the situations were different Clint might have laughed. It wasn’t every day a kid tried to beat up Iron Man. 

 

“Who are you?” The little kid demanded in a near growl, suspicion sounding in his voice. “I don’t know you. You’re not supposed to be near the Bifrost!” 

 

“Real good with kids aren’t you Stark.” Clint snorted.

 

The kid's eyes suddenly darted to him and then flitted over to Natasha. His eyes widened, as he scrambled off of Stark in surprise, and darted back for the crates. Clint flashed a hand sign at Natasha to be ready on standby. Natasha gave him a curt nod then stepped back in the shadows to watch. 

 

Clint took a step towards the metal crate, slowly approaching the direction the kid went. His fingers curled protectively around his bow, but he didn't take out an arrow. He'd done a lot of shit in his life for SHIELD ー _hell_ even before SHIELDー But hurting children was always where he drew the line. It might be one of the only things he and Stark agreed on. 

 

Clint forewent going around the container and instead opted to take the high ground. He grabbed the top of the crate and in one smooth motion hoisted himself up.  He peeked over the side to assess the situation. The kid was crouched defensively in the corner, a wild look in his eyes. Clint moved nearer to the edge of the crate. The kid tilted his head to the side and his eyes roaming around before landing on Clint. 

 

The blond stepped forward, even without a weapon he looked like he was ready to throw himself at Clint the first chance he got. 

 

“You will not take me easily. I am a warrior and my father will come for me!” The kid snarled out with a surprising amount of ferocity. It would have been cute if he was someone else, as it was Clint felt a shiver run down his spine. The kid reminded him of a young Natasha. Missions with child soldiers were never a fun time, not to mention you know, the impending alien invasion. 

 

Clint blinked and looked over to where Natasha was studying the scene behind him. He met her eyes, she inclined her head slightly and Clint knew she understood his plan. 

 

“Hey, it’s okay kid,” Clint said crouching down and putting his hands up in a placating gesture. Step one was to assure the kid you weren’t a threat, “No one is here to hurt you. You just surprised us is all, not used to kids joining us up here in the sky. What’s your name?” 

 

Step two, was to try to form a bond before aggression set the stage. Step three was simple; that didn’t mean he hated it any less though. Step three was the takedown. 

 

The kid glared at him. His eyes were red and slightly puffy like he’d been crying. 

 

“You first archer. How do I know you are not spies of my Father’s Court?” The kid’s eyes darted around the room, checking for enemies before his gaze landed back on Clint. 

 

Clint blinked. That was… not what he expected. Court? Who did this kid think he was? Royalty? Was this brainwashing talking? 

 

“That’s fair, bud,” Clint settled on, trying to keep his tone light, “My name’s Clint Barton, though most people call me Hawkeye.”

 

“Hawkeye?” The kid said slowly as if he was testing the word out for the first time, curiosity sparked in his eyes. Clint scoffed, and Natasha thought his codename was dumb. 

 

Clint frowned internally. Something wasn’t adding up right. The kid clearly had fighting experience. Sure, Stark wasn’t exactly an expert fighter, but he was still much larger and heavier than this kid; the fact that he went down like a sack of potatoes meant something. But the kid didn’t have the hollowed out or lost look like so many of the child soldiers he’d seen before. No, somehow the kid still looked… innocent for lack of a better word. He reminded him of his son, Nathan, like he would still believe in boogeymen and dragons. He was missing something. 

 

Clint shifted his weight and he dropped down next to the kid. A change of plans might be in order.    

 

“Yup,” Clint said popping the last syllable, “I’m one of the best marksmen in the world. I can shoot the wings off a fly at 200 meters.” 

 

“Truly?” The kid asked as he shifted gears from wariness to awe. Definitely not a child soldier, no brainwashed kid looked like that and not even the best spies could look so —so fuckin’ cute. That didn’t mean the kid wasn’t a threat though. 

 

Clint saw Stark gawking behind them like he couldn’t believe the kid was fawning over archery instead of his armor. That or Stark couldn’t believe that he was better with kids but given the notoriety of Stark’s Daddy issues that wasn’t likely. 

 

The kid reached out and tugged on his sleeve, “Show me.” He demanded.  

 

“No problem kid, but I’m gonna need a name. I only show my skills to my friends and I know all my friend's names,” Clint lied smoothly. 

 

“Thor,” The kid burst out excitedly, “I am Thor, Son of Odin. Will you please show me your archery skills now Son of Barton?” The kid turned his big blue puppy eyes on him and Clint gulped. Damn it, this kid was way too cute. 

 

“Sure,” Clint said standing slowly, “We can go down to the range. Why don’t you just take my hand so you don’t get lost?” 

 

He wasn’t sure how this kid got here or what his purpose was, but an occupied compliant kid was a hell of a lot easier to keep an eye on and get information from than a suspicious one with unknown affiliations. Besides, Stark still needed to find the alien tech disrupting their sensors and he had a feeling the kid would only be a distraction. 

 

“Okay!” Thor said jovially, as his little fingers encircled Clint’s hand and clamped down. The kid had quite a grip on him, not enough force to break fingers or anything, but still. At least Clint wasn’t going to lose the kid in the bowels of the Helicarrier, not with a grip like that. As he allowed himself to be pulled out of the hanger, he caught Natasha’s eye and gave her a look that said: ‘Please figure out what the hell is going on.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I attempted to balance Clint from the MCU with comic Clint here, not sure how that turned out. This was from Clint's perspective and I've never written him before so any feedback on that would be very much appreciated. Anyways Thor is on Earth now, even if he doesn't know it yet, during one of the worst possible times. Anyways next chapter has some more Avengers shenanigans and some Loki POV. As always kudos, comments, and constructive criticism are all welcome here so let me know what you guys thought!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clint thinks Thor is getting stranger by the second, but he still can't help but like the kid. It certainly helps that the kid likes him better than Captain America. Meanwhile, Natasha digs up the facts of how a kid ended up on a secure Helicarrier in the first place.

 

If you didn’t count the odd looks the SHIELD personnel were giving him the trip down to the range was surprisingly non-eventful. Thor clung tightly to Clint’s arm and seemed to be taking everything in stride, for the most part, content to follow him further into the helicarrier. There was no hint of the attitude that had the kid trying to punch Stark’s lights out in the hanger. Clint eyed the kid warily, he didn’t know what to make of him. There was clearly something a little off with him, but Clint’s instincts weren’t screaming Defcon five at him. Thor hummed quietly to himself, swinging his left arm happily as he tugged Clint along.

Clint cleared his throat, “So, buddy how did you get all the way up here anyways?”

Thor gives him a confused look, tilting his head to the side, “I do not know what you mean, Hawkeye. I got here with you. Did you perhaps forget that we are going to archery range so you may show me the prowess of your bow?” His speech was oddly formal and occasionally lilted in such a way that it almost seemed like English wasn’t his first language.

“Uh, yeah bud we are. But that’s not really what I meant. Do you know where you are?”

Thor hums to himself as he seems to mull over Clint’s words, “I... I was following my brother… then he,” Thor’s voice cracked, and he hunched his shoulders up, his voice a near whisper “He left me, and it was dark, and I could not see.” Thor took a quick breath and his lip quivered, his grip tightened on Clint’s hand. Before he glared at the wall in front of them, not meeting Clint’s gaze. They walked a few more feet before Thor untensed and continued in a much more cheerful voice, “Then I woke up by the man made of metal and I met you and you’re going to show me your archery!”

Well, shit. At best it sounds like a prank gone wrong and a kidnapping. At worst -well hell- it sounded like the kid’s brother might have sold him to child traffickers. It still didn’t explain how he ended up in SHIELD hanger fifty-thousand feet above sea level though. There were a lot of mysteries wrapped up in the blond little pint-sized package. Hopefully, Natasha was having more luck getting to the bottom of it than he was.

* * *

 

“What do you mean you don’t have camera footage from the hanger?” Natasha asked in a deadly calm tone as she leaned closer to the tech operative’s desk. The tech looked nervously around, twitching uncomfortably in her presence. She mentally rolled her eyes, honestly, for working at an intelligence agency he was rather spineless.

“It’s like I said, ma’am the lightning storm seems to have temporarily fritzed out some of the cameras on the upper levels. The hangar was one of the areas affected.” The man shrugged slightly, “There’s nothing I can do if the footage was never captured.”

Natasha let out an irritated hum. No footage that was certainly convenient. She ran her fingers along her wrist stunners. Far too convenient if you asked her. It seems like she would have to go elsewhere for answers. She’d start with Stark.

* * *

 

Luckily for Clint, the shooting range was empty when Thor and him arrived. At first, Thor seemed a bit confused about where they were, but as soon as Clint moved to set up one of the few straw bullseyes SHIELD kept on hand his face broke out into a grin.

Clint slid his bow off his back and notched an arrow. “Okay, kid watch this.” He drew the bow and in one smooth motion fired. The arrow flew true and hit the bullseye dead center.

Thor nodded appreciatively. Clint grinned and fired another. The arrow hit slightly to the left of the first. People usually found it ‘impressive’ when he split arrows. But, he wasn’t some circus act and that was just a waste of a perfectly reusable arrow. Instead, for those suckers, he wanted to impress he did what he was doing now. Sixteen arrows later and the target had the arrows tightly packed next to each other from the distance they were standing it clearly spelled the word, Thor.

Clint finished and turned to his companion, “So what do you think Thor? Worthy of the name Hawkeye?”

Thor grinned up at him, “You are most skilled indeed,” a sly look crossed Thor’s face, “It does not seem a fair contest though. Perhaps your weapon is enchanted, then it would be no great feat. I think I should test it; only then can you claim to truly have the Hawk’s eyes.

Enchanted, huh? That was the kid’s game. Clint couldn’t keep the grin from creeping onto his face. For all Thor looked like a human puppy, the little shit had a devious streak. It reminded him of his daughter Lylla. She might only be five, but she still managed to goad him into taking ridiculous shots for her entertainment.

“Okay, Thor if you think I make it look easy go for it.” Clint walked over to the target and pulled out his arrows, sliding them back into his quiver before he walked back to where Thor was waiting. Thor enthusiastically took the bow out of his hands. He seemed to examine it closely looking with particular interest at the grip and sight.

This was one of Clint’s more trusted heavy-duty bows. He had dozens scattered in SHIELD bases across the continents. He usually kept them handy in case things went south. Arrows, unlike bullets, could be recycled, especially in close quarters. Sure, he could use a sniper rifle like the rest of them. But then he’d miss the ridiculous look on the bad guys’ faces when they realized their buddy had just been killed by an honest to god arrow. He lived for the little things in this line of work.

Thor had yet to take an arrow and instead was still staring with interest at the bow, “You know how that works bud?”

Thor chewed his lower lip, “Yes, I was admiring your weapons craftsmanship. My father made me, and my brother practice our archery.” He stuck his lower lip out in a pout, “He still will not let me go on a hunt though.” His leather boot scuffed the ground, “I’m still not as good as my brother. Loki bests me every time.” Thor’s voice grew silent as he stared at the bow. Well, apparently Thor’s parents were really committed to the Norse theme. “I much prefer swords anyways like the Valkyries use.”  Thor turned to look at him with a completely straight face and held his hand out for an arrow.

Swords. Who the fuck still used swords? Clint filed that away for later as he reached into his quiver and pulled out a single arrow passing it to Thor. Thor skillfully notched it into the bow and pulled the drawstring back. The arrow flew true and hit the target with a thwack. It was slightly off center compared to Clint’s usual shots, but clearly, the kid knew what he was doing. Clint grinned it wasn’t every day he met someone who appreciated archery as much as he did.

“So, kid, still think it’s a magic bow?” Thor was smiling at him a bright and happy look on his face.

“I fear that I still do not have enough information. Loki tells me the scientific process is important. I think we must have a contest to see who the better archer is.”

Ah, so that was the kid’s game. Surely Nat wouldn’t get too mad at him for showing off, even if the kid did turn out to be a little sociopathic child soldier, it’s not like knowing Clint was a good shot would help him any if SHIELD got serious. Hell, that was practically common knowledge in their field.  “Okay, little man just remember when you lose you asked for it.”

* * *

 

Natasha found Tony sitting alone in the lab. His armor sprawled around him while he tinkered with his helmet. “Stark.” She said in greeting.

He blinked at her seeming to come out of his focused state, “Ms. Rushman, blueberry?”

Natasha blinked as he seemed to pull a Ziploc from nowhere. The man was so much like a squirrel sometimes it was shocking.  Amused she shook her head and Tony shrugged popping a dried berry in his mouth. She carefully stepped around his scattered parts.

“Did you and manage to find the source of the interference?”

Tony rolled a dried blueberry between his fingers before dropping it in his mouth, “Interference? What interference I thought Fury didn’t want us to talk about that?” Natasha rolled her eyes, “But if we’re keeping it between us Red, the readings dissipated while we were up there and then disappeared entirely on our sensors. I took the data we did have to Bruce but,” He shrugged, “I don’t have any answers for you on that. Radiation isn’t really my field.”

The cameras were off and now the sensors were getting finicky. She may not be a scientist, but she didn’t like this at all, “Alright, what can you tell me about the kid then?”

The inventor stared blankly at her for a minute, “Yeah, I can’t say I’ve ever been punched by a kid before. Let alone with the kind of force Tiny Tim was packing down there. Don’t know how he did it, but he managed to put a few dings in my armor. I have Jarvis running diagnostics on it right now.”

Natasha frowned. She hadn’t noticed a weapon on the kid, how did he manage that? She was still missing something important. She could list on one hand the number of organizations that could train a child soldier that well. The Red Room could have if she’d left its network intact after her departure. The shadow organization called the Hand had operatives that could match her, but they were nearly impossible to track, and none of them were children. Was there a new player on the ground? Was this part of the Maw’s plan? She ground her teeth. This was getting more convoluted not less.   

“What happened before Barton and me came to back you up?”

Tony frowned and shuffled the package of dried fruit, “Well, I walked in. I was suited up, so I could scan all the Quinjets, see where the anomaly was coming from and hopefully pry the tech off and whisk it downstairs to my big green science buddy. Then I noticed a heat signature. At first, I thought it was an agent, so I asked if he knew this area was off limits.”

Natasha nodded, for Stark that was a surprisingly composed response.

“I didn’t hear anything, so I fired up the repulsors and went to investigate. I find that caped kid unconscious next to one of the supply crates. He was sprawled out all over the floor. I was, well, concerned you know. Last time I checked top-secret government organizations weren’t supposed to have kids.”

Natasha snorted if only he knew. If anything, it was more likely that covert government departments involved children. She would know better than anyone. An involuntary shiver ran down her spine. Tony blinked at her but continued.  

“Like I said supposed to. So, I went over to wake him up, as soon as I touched his shoulder he jolted awake and started freaking out. I tried to grab him, but he slipped away from me and went back into hiding so I backed off.” Tony reached out and flipped over his helmet his fingers digging into the wiring and pulling out a cord.

“You pretty much saw what happened next, I tried to get him to come out, he tackled me and then Clint did his weird kid hypnosis or something.” Natasha raised an eyebrow at that, “What for a spy that man is freaky good with kids.” Tony said defensively.

She smiled internally, Clint had a protective instinct a mile wide and a soft spot for kids that went against common sense. She would know Budapest was always fresh in her memories.

A thought crossed her mind, “Stark, do you have a way of recording with your suit?”

“What do you think this is 1970? Of course, I have JARVIS keep a backlog. Pepper would kill me if we didn’t keep video footage. Never know when someone will try to take me to court.”

Frankly, that didn’t surprise Natasha she’d worked under Pepper for three months before she’d made contact with Stark in person. The woman was efficient at what she did and ruthless when she needed to be. Can I get a copy? I’d like to analyze the kid’s fighting style and see if that tells us more. Something’s not quite right with him.”

Tony sighed, “You’re betting on child soldier, huh?” She dipped her head in acknowledgment. It always surprised her how observant Tony Stark was when he wasn’t lost in his own ego. “Yeah, I thought so. Shit, my tech was supposed to end war not be used on kids.”

“Sometimes, there’s nothing to be done.” Natasha said with finality, as much as she hated to admit it she was not the norm when it came to dangerous indoctrination and they had more pressing concerns to deal with, “Don’t lose sight of the bigger mission Stark. We still have no idea what Maw is planning with Coulson or the team of scientists he’s taken. Focus on that.”

“Yeah, but, you better not kill that kid no matter what you find.” Natasha gave him a reassuring smile. She would always do what needed to be done, but there was no need to put the billionaire off when they needed his help.

“Here, go crazy,” Stark said, flicking his fingers against his wristwatch and one of the screens in the room lit up with the crisp picture of the hanger.

Natasha said a small thank you and went to settle down and watch the footage. After a minute she paused it and turned back to Stark, “You said you got readings, when will you and Banner have those analyzed?”

“Oh,” Tony flipped his wrist around and glanced at his watch, “About twelve seconds ago.”

* * *

 

Clint was sweating. It turned out the first shot the kid had taken wasn’t a fluke. Thor was actually pretty good with a bow for how young he was. They’d backed up the target several times until it was resting against the back wall. Since Thor was still hitting the target, albeit not as consistently as him, Clint decided a different approach was needed.

He’d popped his head out into the hallway and kidnapped the first young looking staffer he found, seniority had its perks. The young guy, said his name was Fitz, was inching towards the door as soon as he was inside. He claimed he had lab work to do. Clint gave him his most charming smile and politely asked him to throw things for Thor and him to shoot out of the air.

The guy seemed baffled and rattled out some probabilities about how unlikely hitting a moving target at that distance was.

“You do not understand,” Thor whined at the agent, “We must determine if this bow is enchanted for scientific reasons!”

The man paused and opened his mouth like he was ready to argue.  He looked ready to say something about magic not being real but then his mouth snapped shut. It seemed he’d caught sight of Thor’s puppy dog eyes. He sighed running his hand through his curly light brown hair, “You said this was for science?”

Clint grinned and sent the agent down with some smaller paper targets. He told him to toss them up.

“You know a monkey could do this!” Fitz yelled down the range at them.

“Yeah, but we don’t have a monkey, we have you so put on your science hat and get to throwing!” Clint yelled back.

“You know the results won’t be consistent. I could build a machine to drop them at regular intervals then the results would be more accurate-”

“Throw them!” Thor cheered behind him in a booming voice. Fitz scowled and tossed up the paper targets looking like he regretted everything.

“Watch this kid,” Clint said to Thor before he turned his back to the range, held his bow behind his neck and fired an arrow without looking.

He heard a steady thunk and turned around to see his arrow pinning the tiny paper target dead in the center of the bullseye. The shaft of his arrow was in exactly the middle of the paper target.

Thor let out a little breath of awe, “That was glorious!”

“That makes no sense. That shot was improbable. The odds of it happening are- and without looking-” Fitz babbled before he swallowed, and a look of recognition dawned on his face, “You’re Hawkeye!”

Clint grinned and lowered his bow, “The one and only!”

Thor giggled behind him, “Yes, you do indeed have eyes like hawks. You’re like Heimdall you must be able to see everything!” Clint chuckled, honestly it was nice to get this sort of admiration from someone for his skills. Usually, everyone was too busy being scared shitless by Natasha to notice him and when they did notice him it was usually to laugh at his choice of weapon, that didn’t usually last too long; it was hard to find arrows funny when you had one stuck in your gut.

A curt cough cut through his inner celebration.

He turned around see Rogers standing by the door still in his Captain America get up, his arms crossed over his chest. His eyes flickering over to Thor, “Hey, Cap, what’s up?”

“Barton, Romanov sent me to find you.”

Clint nodded his head. Natasha probably wanted to compare notes. The fact that it was Steve down here instead of the whole strike team probably meant that she hadn’t concluded Thor was a threat, at least not yet.

Clint looked back over at the younger agent and Thor. Fitz looked over the moon at getting the chance to see Captain America, typical. Clint could practically see him vibrating with curiosity. He sighed, what could he do? The attention was nice while it lasted. Thor, on the other hand, looked on with mild interest, but just like with Iron Man he didn’t seem star struck.

“Are we going Hawkeyes?” Thor asked stepping closer tentatively, staring up at Rogers as he gripped his cape in his hands. The kid really did seem to be treating the piece of cloth like a security blanket.

Clint rubbed his jaw as he folded his bow over his back and gathered his remaining arrow out of the target. He couldn’t take Thor with him, but he needed an accuse. He cast an eye around the room, the younger agent clearly couldn’t take him he was too inexperienced and a little too geeky to keep a good eye on the blond pipsqueak. That left him with- he locked eyes with Rogers.

Yup, it would have to be Rogers. Now the question would be if he could convince Thor not to follow him or run off.

“Hey, Thor this is my friend Captain America.”

Steve’s face twisted into a grimace at the title, “Please, call me Steve.” He said sticking his hand out.

Thor eyed the hand warily before he reached out to take it, pulling Rogers forward into a tight hug with a slap on the back, or it might have been if the two were anywhere near to the same height. Instead, Rogers stumbled forward, half falling as Thor latched onto his legs and patted the back of his thighs.

“Greetings Captain America friend of the Hawk’s eyes!”

It took everything in Clint not to laugh out loud at how awkward America’s icon looked. Rogers’ face went bright red and he went as stiff as a board. Fitz didn’t have Clint’s kind of restraint he immediately laughed and then looked embarrassed as he met with the Captain America’s eyebrows of dissapointment TM . The poor kid couldn’t take it. Blushing Fitz excused himself and ducked out of the shooting range.

Rogers cleared his throat and Thor released his leg hug and stared curiously up at Rogers, “You are a Captain truly?”

“They keep telling me that, so I guess I am, and you are?”

“I am Thor son of Odin!” Thor proclaimed loudly. Rogers shot Clint a confused look. Clint shrugged.

“Nice to meet you,” Rogers said in a polite tone before turning back to Clint, “Romanov wants you for a debriefing in the lab.”

And yup, Clint was well aware of that but there was still the kid-sized issue in the room.  

Thor’s stomach took that moment to let out a high gurgling sound that echoed around the range. Thor looked up at him with wide eyes his hand automatically went to his stomach.

And there it was: the perfect escape.

“Hey, Cap, why don’t you take Thor down to the kitchens. Go find him some Pop Tarts or something to chew on.” Steve started to sputter something, but Clint leaned in to rest a hand on his shoulder and said in a lowered voice, “Keep an eye on the kid. We think he might have some link to the alien invasion.” Steve stiffened slightly but then relaxed and dipped his head in agreement.

“You are leaving Hawkeyes?” Thor asked, frowning.

“Sorry, bud,” Clint reached out and tried to ruffle the kid’s hair, only for the kid to dip away from him and scowl, “But I’m leaving you with Steve. You’re going to love him. Everyone loves him. He’s tons of fun you can ask him about all the times he punched Hitler!”

Thor seemed to pique up at the mention of violence and his scowl lessened as he looked at Steve again, before declaring, “He cannot shoot like you, but I suppose I can watch your friend while you must work.”

Clint laughed, leave it to the kid to somehow completely flip around what was actually happening. It reminded him of Lylla, “Thanks, Thor. I know I could count on you. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here you go! Enjoy some more cute Thor and a Fitz cameo that I wasn't expecting at all but it happened anyways. Also, I readjusted the chapter count because as I've been writing the next couple of chapters some scenes I had no plans on writing happened. Next, Thor and Steve's kitchen adventures and Loki admits that hide and seek with Thor may have been the worst idea he's had in a while. As always critiques, comments, and kudos are very welcome!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve attempts to get answers out of Thor. They end up eating Pop-Tarts. Thor really likes Pop-Tarts and Steve. Meanwhile, the rest of the Avengers and Loki come to certain realizations.

“So, uh you’re hungry?”

 

Thor nodded his head vigorously, crumbs flew out of his mouth as he answered, “Very much! I ate only a handful of berries at midday because I was waiting for my sister’s feast to start!” As quickly as the first Pop-Tart emerged from the silver packaging it disappeared into Thor’s mouth. Steve blinked. He sure hoped this is what you were supposed to feed kids in this day and age.

 

“I like this food. What is it called?”

 

Steve glanced at the box, “Pop-Tarts.”

 

“Mmm,” Thor hummed appreciatively as he finished the sweet. He turned his blue eyes towards Steve. “Another!” The kid demanded.

 

Steve sighed running a hand through his cropped blond hair. Before turning to the brightly colored box. He reached his hand inside only to find it empty. “You sure you still hungry kid?”

 

Thor stuck his chin out and crossed his arms over his chest, “Good Captain I am not a child.”

 

Steve held in his snort. Some things didn’t change in a hundred years and kids always trying to act older than they were certainly hadn’t. In some ways that was a comfort. A loud gurgle of a stomach echoed around the room and Thor patted his stomach.

 

“Guess that answers that question,” Steve said, standing up to retrieve another box from the cupboard. Hopefully, this was alright. Usually, Steve didn’t spend much time in SHIELD’s common areas. He preferred to have his own space and not be gawked at like circus act. Well, Barton had mentioned Pop-Tarts explicitly so it was probably fine. He opened the top reading the back of the colorful cardboard box for the first time, “Hey Thor, it says something about putting them in the toaster to heat them up. Want to try that?”

 

Thor nodded his head before piping up curiously, “What is a toaster?”

 

Steve’s eyebrows rose that was certainly a question. Even back in the forties, they’d had toasters. Sure, Steve didn’t have one personally, but he’d seen them in some of the fancier places he’d been to in Europe. Were they not a common thing in the 21st century?

 

Steve looked around the room before finding the familiar shape of a toaster sitting on the counter. It looked smaller and less bulky than the ones he remembered. It looked similar enough and Steve removed the Pop-Tarts from the silver package and slid them into the slots on the shiny red appliance.

 

Thor had gotten up from his seat at the table and wandered curiously over to watch what Steve was doing.

 

“How does this strange machine work?” Thor asked, reaching his finger out to poke the machine. Sparks sprung from the toaster and Steve pulled Thor away, pushing him behind him as the appliance hissed and black smoke began to billow out of the machine.  

 

A burning smell filled the kitchen and the smoke alarm overhead began to blare loudly. Steve ripped the cord from the wall, hoping that would at least stop the burning, as the spluttering machine sizzled. Steve didn’t know much about modern technology but he was pretty sure toasters weren’t supposed to do that.

 

Thor clapped his hands delighted, “That was a most marvelous display Captain. I see why they recommend this toaster. It does indeed toast. How do we get these Pop-Tarts out?” Thor reached out to grasp the machine again only for the Pop-Tarts to pop up suddenly blackened to a crisp. Without a second thought, Thor reached out and stuck the burned snack into his mouth before offering the other one to Steve. Steve shook his head and then watched in horror as Thor then began to eat that one too.

 

The kid didn’t even seem offended by the taste in the least. When he finished chewing a thoughtful look crossed his face, “It reminds me of when my sister tries to cook Bilgesnipes on her hunts.”

 

Really what was Steve supposed to say to that?

 

Steve stepped out into the hall and asked for someone to help him with the blaring alarm in the breakroom, motioning to the smoke dissipating from the room. The agent had a starstruck look on his face and didn’t ask any questions as he got up on a chair and popped two small metal sticks out of the alarm. The room was left blissfully silent and Steve let out a sigh of relief.

 

“Do you need anything else, Captain America, sir?” The agent asked standing up straighter and saluting.

 

“No. Thank you though. I’m not really used to all-“ Steve waved his hand, “this.”

 

The agent nodded knowingly, “Of course sir. Let me know if you ever need anything.” With that, the man ducked back out into the hall.

 

“Your troops respect you greatly,” Thor commented quietly, looking somewhat awed, “Hawk’s eyes must be right. You truly are a great leader!”

 

Great now the kid was looking at him with hero worship eyes, “I don’t know if I’d say that. I know a lot of people that would say I’m more stupid than great most days. Or at least they used to.”

 

It hurt thinking of Bucky, Peggy, and the other Howlies. If they were here with him, they’d probably be laughing their asses off at how everyone deferred to him as a great leader and American icon. They’d remind him it wasn’t too long ago when he was a showgirl. But really it was a long time ago, almost eighty years now, and he was alone with all these people that only knew the image of the man they’d read about in books: Captain America, never Steve Rogers.

 

Thor was staring at him intently with an oddly sympathetic look, “I see you have lost your shieldbreathren I’m very sorry. I’m sure they ride together in Valhalla. That’s what my mother tells me. She says all great warriors go to Valhalla and feast for eternity. Someday I want to go there too and ride with my brother and sister.”

 

“That’s a nice thought,” Steve really doesn’t want to talk about this, especially not with a kid. But, then again, this kid was oddly intuitive. How many people had even guessed what he was feeling most days and here was this odd child that didn’t seem to know what America was, let alone what Captain America was, staring right down into his deepest regret.

 

Steve coughed and changed the subject, “So, um, your cape is very nice.”

 

“Thank you, Captain. My mother spelled it for me. She said she weaved it from the light of the sun!”

 

“Your mother sounds like quite a woman. She must love you a lot.”

 

“She does!” Thor happily took a bite of a fresh Pop-Tart and started chewing. Halfway, through his chewing slowed and then he started bawling. Great big ugly sobs that wracked his body and echoed across the kitchen.

 

Steve flinched back. What was he supposed to do with this? One second the kid was talking about the afterlife and the next he was crying over his mother. He’d never had kids. Hell, he’d hardly ever been on more than a handful of dates with dames. The closest he’d come to kids was when he was with the showgirls and the women in the audience handed him babies to kiss. Still, Thor reminded him of Bucky’s little sisters when they skinned their knees and came in all teary-eyed. Bucky’s Mom always pulled them into a hug and reassured them everything would be fine. That seemed to work with them so that’s what he’d do too. After all, Bucky’s Mom was one of the smartest women he’d ever met.

 

Steve moved around the table and wrapped his arms around Thor, gently rubbing small circles around his back.

 

“Thank you, Rogerson.” Thor wiped at nose with his sleeve, embarrassed, “I am sorry that you had to see me like this. Warriors are not meant to cry.” 

 

“Nah, pal, it’s alright. Even the strongest of us, need to let it out sometimes.” He lowered his voice and leaned closer to Thor, “I do too, sometimes.”

 

Thor’s bright sky-blue eyes widened before he leaned closer to Steve and let out another sob, “I want to go home!”

 

“Don’t worry, kid. We’ll get you there. I’m sure Barton is working on it right now.”  

 

* * *

 

 

“Where’s the kid?” Tony asked, glancing up from his screen as he heard the lab door slid open and Natasha and Clint strode into the room.

 

“With Steve in the kitchen eating Pop-Tarts.” Natasha said as she gracefully propped herself up against the wall, “I guess he heard Thor’s stomach rumble while Clint was showcasing his marksmanship.”

 

“Huh, Captain Patriotism apparently has some hidden Mama-bear instincts who would have guessed? So, Legolas,” Tony said turning to Clint, “What can you figure out about where the kid came from? Because the readings we’re getting from the hanger are off the charts.”

 

“These are in line with what we might see with a Bose-Einstein Condensate. It’s weird these results have never been replicated outside of any lab ever.” Bruce said speaking up from across the lab.

 

“English, please Doctor,” Natasha said with a frown. Clint was thankful he was by no means stupid, but a circus upbringing and then spy training didn’t really lend itself well to a discussion of physics.

 

“What I’m saying is however the kid got here. The energy surrounding him, it doesn’t exist on Earth.” Bruce said, looking deeply serious.

 

Clint piped up, “Look I might not be the most scientifically minded of us here,” Stark snorted from across the lab, “but, I have the most experience with kids from all walks of life and I trust Natasha’s instincts more than anyone’s so,” Clint turned to Nat, “what do you think?”

 

Natasha’s eye’s filtered across the faces in the room, “He isn’t a child soldier or a spy.”

 

“Okay, I didn’t even know that was an option on the table Romanov,” Stark said horrified. Banner had his own twin look of dawning horror as he realized exactly what they were getting into.

 

“Jesus, he can’t be more than eight.” Banner mumbled as he nervously removed his glasses and rubbed the lenses on his shirt.

 

Natasha ignored them both and continued, “He’s far too easy to read for that. Still, it’s clear he has some sort of training, military or otherwise. I still can’t figure out how he got on the carrier to begin with. He’s not on any footage. It’s like he just appears.”

 

“Do you think he’s with Maw? Alien tech?” Clint asked, trying to get a read on exactly what level of threat she assigned to their resident babysitting charge.

 

Natasha shook her head, “No, he doesn’t appear to be going after preliminary strategic targets and all of the digs I’ve taken for information haven’t turned up anything. As of now, I’d say he’s clean but we shouldn’t let him out of our sight. I don’t believe in coincidences.”

 

Clint turned to Banner, “And your readings? Maybe Maw and his goons went after the kid same as the cube?” 

 

“Why though? Sure, the kid seems like a--” Banner waved his hand in the air, trying to find the right word, “human puppy. It makes no sense, not unless there's another factor at play. It makes even less sense to deliver him to a group that’s actively trying to stop you. We’re missing a part of the puzzle. Besides the sensors on Tony’s suit picked up gravitational forces that are frankly mind-boggling, there’s no way it’s not connected.”

 

“You wouldn’t think he’s a human puppy if he’d tackled you down in the hanger.” Stark snorted, “Besides even without that footage,” He flicked his hand and a series of diagrams appeared over the table.

 

“Are those--” Bruce started his eyes widening.

 

“Yes, indications of dark matter particles combined with some type of unidentified energy source. They’re coming off the kid himself.”

 

“English Stark. What are you saying?”

 

Stark rolled his eyes and shot an exasperated look at Banner, “That was English, but for you commoners: I’m saying that Shirley Temple down there has trace elements and energy surrounding him that’s not of this world.”

 

“Are you saying he’s an alien?” Natasha asked, her eyes narrowing as she filed the new information away.

 

“It’s a distinct possibility.”

 

“Yeah, right you saw him! He’s just a kid. He is named Thor I suppose. Maybe his parents are some freaks in a Norse Cult he said his father’s named Odin.” Clint mused.

 

“That doesn’t exactly explain how he ended up on an armed floating island 10,000 feet above sea level.” Natasha pointed out.

 

“Hitchhiking?” Clint tried, only to be met with an unconvinced look from both the scientists and Natasha, “Fine. My best guess is that he ended up on board before launch. Not sure how. But it’s pretty clear the kid doesn’t know either. I just don’t buy that he’s an alien when he smiles like any other kid.”

 

His logic was met with unimpressed looks from the others.

 

“Our main priority should still be finding the cube before those aliens do whatever they have planned with it,” Clint said folding his arms over his chest.

 

“We’re still tracking it. They could have taken it anywhere in the world we should have a lock,” Tony stared at his watch, “Oh, right about now. What have you got for me, Jarvis?”  

Coordinates flickered across the screen before settling on New York.

 

“Son of a bitch!” Stark cursed, “Coulson really does know how to cut a man down to the bone.”

 

On the screen in front of them stood the clear image of Stark Tower.

 

* * *

 

 

As soon as Thor scampered out of the room, presumably to hide, Loki sat back down and flicked back to the page he had left off on. Finally, some peace and quiet. The only reason Thor was even thrust on him to babysit was due to all the staff being preoccupied in preparing for Hela’s coronation at the end of the week. It would take hours for Thor to even suspect that Loki wasn’t looking for him. If Loki was really lucky Thor would fall asleep in his hiding space until dinner.

 

The hours passed in a blur. Loki was hyper-focused on finishing his study of illusion magic, soon enough his mother might even let him move on to healing and teleportation magic.

 

A light knock came at the door and startled Loki out of his thoughts, “Enter,” Loki called.

 

A maid opened the door, “Pardons my prince,” She said with a curtsy, “The Queen would like to inform you and Thor to start preparing for dinner. Some of the dignitaries from Alfheim have arrived early for your sister’s coronation and she wishes to make it a formal affair.”

 

Loki scrunched his nose in displeasure. By dignitaries, they no doubt meant those three lovestruck princes that practically salivated over his sister. Dinner would be a horrible affair of attempted flirtation on their part. It was enough to make him want to wretch. Thank the Norns that his sister seemed to find them just as offensive as he did and spent most of the time making subtly biting remarks to them and flirting with the Captain of the Valkyries. That was still annoying but at least that’s what Hela always did if given the chance.

 

“Ah, that’s fine. Tell my Mother that Thor and I will be down and acceptably dressed when the time comes.”

 

Loki blinked. Then blinked again.

 

_Oh, Hels!_

He’d completely forgotten about Thor. He should have been back hours ago, banging on the library door and whining about how Loki had tricked him. Instead, the palace had been unusually quiet. That didn’t bode well.

 

The maid bowed and then quietly shut the library door behind her.

 

Loki quickly scrambled up, placing his bookmark and closing his book, placing it on the shelf nearest him. Then he stomped off to find Thor, surely, he couldn’t have gone far.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter is shorter than I would have liked, but it legitimately fought me every step of the way. I knew what scenes I needed to get the rest of the plot rolling but it was just not happening. Anyways better late than never I suppose and I have a feeling the next chapter is going to be easier to write since it's partially from Loki's POV. Anyways thanks to all you readers and commenters I really appreciate you guys even though I've been hecka slow about responding to comments recently! Until next time hope you enjoyed.


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